Monday, March 24, 2008

On "relaxation" and why the enlightened have no need of this rubbish...

The Master is pleased. Since his thoughts have been publicised on this record sheet, his message has started to travel the world, through the media of sport and rowing. Discples of the School of Master Yung Young will show their devotion in the field of battle at the Rowing World Cup. The Master's two leading disciples, Messrs. Ginn and Free are already showing their devotions, as will Miss Vernon, a woman who exemplifies the mission of the Yung Young School of Guns. The Master's message is alse being received by those who aspire, and their devotions are pleasing. The Master wishes to note of Miss Parry, whose daily activities are a metaphor for one who wishes to achieve.

But what of other matters that beset the Master? In one of our meditation sessions, Mr. Ginn posed a worthy question of the Master. Mr. Ginn is a man who demonstrates intensity and commitment in all that he does, perhaps too much. But he is a man who is self-aware, and is developing himself towards self-actualisation. His question of the Master was, "Master, how do you relax after a long day of devotion, prayer, scholarship, and work on the water or in the Temple of Steel?"

The Master's response to this question was not one he is proud of. The Master threw a blast of mental energy that knocked over a great pile of steel, making a great mess of the Temple of Steel. The mental blast also stunned several of his adherents. Not the outcome he had been hoping for, and proof that even the greatest of us has facets of their mind that need addressing. But once he had calmed down, and a few of his more comely disciples had cleaned up the Temple of Steel, the Master thought.

The truly developed individual has no need of relaxation. The Master is such an individual. The Master has no need to relax, outbursts of energy notwithstanding. This is because he is completely in touch with his emotions and needs. The actualised adherent can live in the moment. He has no need to "take it easy", or relax, and has learned from a great Australian philosopher, Mark Brandon Read, the philosophy of "Harden the Fuck Up". Hence, the disciple can accept pain and suffering and vagaries of the body because their soul is pure. There is no need of relaxation for the Master.

The Master sets the following precepts for being able to live in the moment, getting rid of all this "relax" stuff, and truly hardening the fuck up. Mr. Read may have been stabbed many times, but his pain and suffering do not compare to the Master. His precepts have been developed by the Master. They focus on self-administered pain. For what victory is there in dealing with pain that has been extrinisically earned? None. It is tolerance. The Master's adherents go out there and find pain.

The Master prescribes:
- Curls: Many of them. For the adherent to focus on this aspect is important. Only on their thirtieth set of the day may they be granted true awareness of what they do. True awareness is being able to feel every muscle, nerve and tendon on the body screaming for mercy, and giving none.
- Meditation: Not the airy-fairy zen paradox rubbish. The Master prefers to place himself in a time and place of maximum stress - such as a train accident, or a motor wreck - and focus internally and completely. The Master has no need of sympathy or empathy, and gives none. He is self actualised, and does not need to care for those who do not live his teachings.
- Pain: The Master's favourite method for this is to start bar brawls. For a warrior of note, this is no challenge. But the Master starts conflict for pain. To receive pain is to open the soul and to harden up. Of course, once the Master has received sufficient pain for enlightenment, he dines on the livers of those foolish enough to accept his challenge. They are unworthy of their place in this world.

This is not a one day concept. The most devout of his adherence have 138 days to learn true self-awareness. Will their livers be the next to face the wrath and barbeque of Master Yung Young?

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